My Darkness




lonely

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Watching j play this new video game through his TV.  It's crazy what smart TVs can do now days.

just got given this shirt by Chantel cause in don't own any clothing. 

I went to the lcbo go pick up a six pack for the three of us.  I find I can't sleep unless I have two beers.  I might try buying some melatonin tomorrow.  gotta watch my budget though. Think I'm working tomorrow... Monday at 230 is my in person meeting with my bail supervisor.  I can't believe this is my life. 
I hope it only gets better.  

I'm thinking Monday I wake up early and go to 420 cooper... And all for their walk in therapy.  I have to show the crown in doing whatever it takes to stay out of jail. 

I'm scared. I am more scared than I've ever been in my life.  
Help me. 


Ich liebe dich


Ich liebe dich

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Can this nightmare be over soon


Why bother

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 Even my parents don't seem to give a fuck about me.  My mom and dad have drank the koolaod.  In two weeks I've lost, mom, dad, sister, wife, cousin, aunt.. You win life. Or the ppl in this world.  I knew being how i am, kind, and still have faith in humanity... would end up fucking me. 

I honestly just wanna sleep. But my heart actually hurts.

I try again. 


spend the day woodworking

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Just getting a ride home now. Was cool working again. Especially with with wood.   I can't even get my tools though. Gonna update my day a bit later this evening when. I'm less stressed.  I'm essentially a stress ball.. I've lost like 24 lbs in the past 6 or 7 weeks.  Probably not healthy.  Lol


early to rise

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Was just woken up with some McDonald's and a coffee.  In need to go to work today, even though it's -15 out and try and assemble these drawers for a client.   Fingers crossed we can use Miguel's workshop that's heated because I don't see us lasting in this weather. 

Had a terrible sleep. Dreams about being in jail.  It was really traumatic.. I really can't go back. Just take me besid the barn and shoot me.  

Also I have heartburn and the runs and a headache.  Really rough to stay positive today. 

I miss my best bud. 
I miss my parents. 


woke up

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Had another nightmare my mom died and I was in jail and wasn't able to attend her funeral.  Fml


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I will never give up on us.  My heart may give up on me though. 


About me

  • I'm BRENT BRENT BRENT
  • From Ottawa, Canada
  • This is a glimpse into my crazy life
  • My profile

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